Coffee Zombie

Caffeine does something to you. But what?


Life consists of stories. Science is part of life. Don’t deny that. Enjoy it. 🙂


I love the coffee mug in my office. It looks like it has come from space, all stars and stuff on it. I took it and prepared to stand up.

«I can do this!» I said and put both the cup and myself down again.

A colleague stopped in her tracks and stuck her nose into my office.

«What can you do?»

I looked up. She grimaced when she saw my face.

«Not drink coffee.» I said. «Have to cut out the coffee. I drink too much of it. Got barely through the day yesterday. Still couldn’t sleep at the end `cause of that d… coffee.»

«You’re just too lazy to walk over to marketing.» she said. «I’m told we get our own machine back next week, by the way. I’m on my way to get one n—»

«Screw caffee!»

She laughed right in my face.



«You just said ‘cay-fee’.»


«Here, if you’re tired, I’ll get you your coffee.» she said. «Can’t have you like that. We got some clients coming over and Mr. Master Communicator ain’t communicating well right now.»

«No, thank you.» I said.

She left. ‘Cay-fee’?! What was she even talking about?

Alright, I thought, I can do this! Cay-fee, my a…! I drew myself up from a crouch, which was deeper than I had realized, and made my e-mail backlog disappear within minutes.

«That’s what I’m talking about!»

«Talk about what?» my colleague asked, exactly one steaming cup of coffee in her hand.

I beamed.

«Just finished my e-mails.» I said standing up. «Never been so quick with it. That presentation for your clients is next. I’ll just take a short trip to the bathr—»

«Ouch!» I heard my colleague say.

«—oom.» I said, quite subdued. I had not managed to miss the frame of my office door on the way out.

For a second or two, the background noises in the office were the only sounds I heard.

«Just get me a coffee, will you?» I said.

«Will do.» my colleague answered and disappeared in the corridors towards marketing.


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